


How to Break a Heart

by thanatosianCascade



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/M, Sadstuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-07
Updated: 2013-10-07
Packaged: 2017-12-28 17:34:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/994670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thanatosianCascade/pseuds/thanatosianCascade
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Being given false hope is usually preferrable to just being told that something is impossible, but somehow, the latter is often far easier to cope with in the long run.</p>
            </blockquote>





	How to Break a Heart

**Author's Note:**

> This is a repost from my Fanfiction.net account, Meulin's Disciple. Enjoy!

Commodore Nepeta; that was her position on Vriska's ship. Or at least it was some silly title that aforementioned ceruleanblood had appointed her. Nepeta really had no idea what a Commodore was, but it sounded really fancy and—in her own words—"very impurrtant"

But the exciting novelty of being a Commodore (whatever that really was) wore off rather quickly, setting way to more woeful thoughts, dreams unrealized, a ship that never set sail. Ah yes... Of all the ships that had been doomed to never leave the harbor,  _this_  one had been the most difficult to leave behind.

Arguably, the hardest part of being a shipping expert was remaining impartial. When shipping, one must leave their personal feelings out of the equation... At least when examining and reexamining all of the different possibilities. But once said possibilities have been examined and determined, it is actually quite normal to succumb to something commonly known as one's "feels", whether they be good or bad.

Despite her youth, Nepeta did all parts of her job very well. She had a natural knack for the occupation. But however good she was at shipping, she secretly allowed herself the guilty pleasure of a practically taboo practice (among shipping experts, at least) of allotting her OTP slot to a ship involving  _herself_. She knew it was an unwritten rule that all other ships come before those involving oneself, but goddammit,  _she_  had quadrants to fill too!

Quadrants to fill, and a blood pusher full of flushed feelings...

But despite her best efforts, despite all of her deepest desires and her determination, none of it ever came to fruition. Between Karkat's constant self-loathing, Terezi's own flushed attraction for the beautiful mutantblood, and her shyness and reluctance to admit anything to Karkat, she eventually ended up dead and with what felt like nothing to show for it.

It was as she was thinking upon this that she was startled from her thoughts when Vriska called out that the ship was headed into another dream bubble. She nodded absently.

xXx

In the bubble, she stayed on the ship. Feferi had approached her, asked if she was alright. "I... just need some time to think."

Feferi placed a hand on Nepeta's shoulder briefly, then walked away to explore, leaving her friend to what Nepeta herself would probably describe as "broken feels"

Nepeta stared blankly at the fabricated sky, her sight focused inward. At what could have been, at what she could never  _have_...

"You're thinking about Karkat, aren't you?"

Nepeta turned her head abruptly towards the voice, finding that it was her dead dream self. Or at least one of them. Vriska had taken (hardly any) time to mention that the dead duplicates they would come across are all from doomed timelines. Nepeta didn't really know how to answer, but she figured that her doomed dream self would know it regardless.

"You don't need to tell me; of  _course_  you are."

After all, they were technically both  _her_.

"I saw you here by yourself, and wanted to tell you not to worry and not to lose hope."

"Why not? I'm dead and Karkat's... not." Nepeta said forlornly. Then she sighed and murmured, "He was pawlways meant for Terezi anyway..."

Her doomed duplicate growled. "So what?!  _I_  ended up with Karkat!"

Nepeta looked at her as though she her thinkpan had suddenly been impaled on one of her horns. "It's true! He's God Tier too! We're really happy together."

"But-"

"Listen. Just beclaws he's alive and you're dead doesn't mean that pawll hope is lost. Who knows? Maybe he'll die too and then you can confess! That's how it happened to me." Nepeta's duplicate smiled, but Nepeta herself remained hesitant. "My point is... There's pawlways hope." And at that moment, the Alpha Nepeta couldn't help but smile a bit as well. Maybe there  _was_  hope for her OTP, no matter how faint.

"There we go! Oh! Looks like you're pawll getting ready to head off. I purrobably should too; Karkat's purrobably waiting for me. Bye! And don't lose that hope!"

Nepeta briefly waved at her copy, and before she knew it, the ship had left the bubble.

xXx

It started with a bright light. The sight was visible from all of Paradox Space. Then there was an enormous explosion. Everyone watched on helplessly.

Having just seen the destruction of the dream bubble they just passed through, everyone on the ship mourned, however briefly, in their own way.

Nepeta watched the disastrous spectacle wideeyed. She absently removed her hat and held it to her chest, hanging her head as she had just witnessed the death of her hopes and dreams...

Somewhere deep inside, she knew that she truly never had a chance with Karkat. After all, doomed timelines were splits from the main timeline in which what was never meant to happen did.

So she watched the death of her hopes and dreams...

... And reluctantly, she finally bid them farewell.


End file.
